Marriage and finances

I came across this article , which spoke about a list of financial  guidelines for ppl about to get married .. I was young n super innocent , didn't  look or care abt finances .. I used to earn peanuts  n had  literally nothing in my bank account and there I was going to be married and I fell for my husband when he said " I have  no bank balance , I am working hard to make it big .. Have plans of on site  and I'm sure one day I will make it " .. Very filmy n stupid u might say but trust me at that moment it felt perfect .. No one had ever spoken their heart out with such honesty in their eyes .

Today,  I look back n laugh at my stupidity most of the times we argue related to finances .. He wants to invest / take risks and I want a debt free life .. I do not want any  financial commitments .. I have a simple dream n wanna lead a simple life ... Never ever dreamt of living in luxuries coz I  dnt want it ..:) .. Not unless I win a lotto then I wanna spend n live a luxurious life  :)

My Prince Charming !

My 4 year old is just a perfect charmer .. He speaks the right words and knows how to win a woman .. Trust me on that .. Here are some of the things he's said to me and it has melted me ..
" mummy I love you to the moon , to the stars and all the way back to the earth "
" mummy , you make the best pasta .. Can you pls teach nadia( the school cook) "
"Mummy I do not want you to grow old and get walking stick "
" I love you the most in this whole wide world "
" mummy you look so beautiful .. You should leave your hair and put some lipstick all the time "
" mummy you look like a princess in this dress , please buy it "

Love my baby .. Gosh I hate tht he's growing up so quick !!

Murphy's law

Murphy was indeed a smart guy .. No one would have thought of blaming all the screwups in our life to some law of nature !! 

Every time I run to the station and manage to reach on time , I  notice the train delayed by exactly 5 min , had I walked and saved on my energy , 100% chances are the train would have reached on time without delay and in the process i would have missed the train !! 

Today I left my desk and started rushing to catch my evening train back home , the lift took extra 2 min than usual time , I met a colleague on my way out and spent 3 more min conversing , I bid bye to everyone and started to run when the signal just turned red and I had to wait for 5 min to cross the road and finally after all the huffing and puffing , I reached the station just in time to see my train leave !!

Tho I was annoyed , very mad at the entire proceedings , I decided to blame it on Murphy !! 

Brown ??

Okay I must admit , I did not consider myself to be brown .. I thought I was wheatish !! Yes honest to god , if you don't believe go to India millions of them claim to be wheatish !! I did not know the colour of my skin tone until I was of the marriageable age and ppl would ring my parents and ask them to describe me and my mom would sit on the phone and tell them my height and my education and where I was working and then I would hear her say wheatish complexion and then she would look for me and make me apply turmeric and milk cream on my face and tell me it would improve my skin tone -Trust me it did nothing !!

Then I travelled to US on work and heard ppl say white / black and brown - well I was told I can't use the word black it was offensive . How come no one told them using the term brown was offensive too .. I was wheatish and not Brown !!

However my son thinks he's white .. Try beating that !!

Mother's Day - thank you note to a beautiful child !!

Over the years,I have had my doubts if I did the right job being a perfect mum, but looking at how my son has turned out to be he has put all my doubts to rest. I have been a vivid hater of mums who praise their kids but never in my wildest dream did I think I wud start doing the same . 

Every Mother's Day I have received hand prints : flowers , drawings . This year got a card , where my 4 yr olds teacher asked him why he loves his mom : this is what he said " I love my mom because I love her !! She cooks yummy food and takes me to the parks and loves being silly with me " there were drops of tears rolling outta my eyes when I read that !!

I love my son to bits , he's the best thing that has happened to me . He comes up with so many questions , I love the way his mind works , this Mother's Day he made me promise I wouldn't grow old and turn into a grand mother , he wants me to remain the way I am , jump and dance with him forever .. How cute !!!

He drew a pic of me with " jelly tummy " coz my tummy is wobbly ,let's say  that particular statement didn't go quiet well with me !!

2 days ago I had a migraine attack , had a splitting headache and was unable to sit , I couldn't believe what my son did , he put me in bed and covered me in blankets , switched off the lights and let me sleep , while he played in the other room and ate banana and waited till his dad came home to feed him . He constantly checked to see if I was sleeping .. How very considerate !! 

A few weeks ago.. I was complaining to my son on how an elderly man was advicing me and I dnt like it , my 4 year old looks up and says "mummy that's what happens if you talk to strangers , if you smile at him he will talk to you , he doesn't talk to me coz I don't smile " 

- I was dumbfound but agreed to take his advice !! 

Love thy neighbour .. Said a Moron ?

Growing up I did not realise how my neighbours were an integral part of my life .. I assumed that's how it is .. I did not realise I can show my finger and walk away from all the rubbish .. Well I wudnt have , coz I was this ideal kid who wudnt raise her voice , who would listen to everyone , never argue , would even consider what my neighbours thought I should wear . 

I was constantly compared with my neighbours marks not coz my parents made tht remark but my neighbours would stop me and ask " how much marks you scored ?" , "why so less?", "too many distractions eh ?" " my brother in laws , cousins son has scored a very good score , he's very intelligent " . 

" wear bangles , bindi , some gold on your body " , " wear a dupatta " 

No these weren't by my parents but neighbours who had no business with my life . 

If ever I was seen with a guy then mostly I  was having an affair , hence the delay in my marriage . I would make fnds park cars one mile away from my house , coz I did not want people to talk rubbish . 

Now that I've moved away from all that shit I think why did I give someone a chance to talk about me , it would have been nicer to live the way I wanted . I was dumb or rather I was part of the same society and was too scared to break away ? Unsure of the answer !!

Are you a royalist ?

Well I donno if I am one .. I loved Diana .. Totally admired her .. Her strength to communicate with the sick melted me . The day I heard abt her death I had tears especially when I saw Harry n William on TV made me cry for those kids .. I watched the movie Diana : queen of hearts it broke me to know what she went through very unfair so sad for her to live in a loveless marriage and being stuck to a boring man while she was carefree and full of Fun .. Very sad indeed ...it must have been very hard to pretend to be ok while she was dying inside .

I watched William n Kate's wedding on TV , watched their interviews and totally loved it .. She would be soo very proud . I am sure she did a good job in raising them the kids are so fine . 

Recently Kate n William were supposed to visit Sydney along with baby George .. I was there waiting to catch a glimpse of them , no I didn't see them as I had to return to work but then was following news about them .. Gosh after all these revealing I can't hide the fact that I am a royalist indeed ;)

Natures friend !!

Kids are amazing their imagination is way beyond what we adults can . They have a free spirit and welcome everything with an open mind . 

I have one such curious mind at home , who wants to experiment and explore all the time.

 His favourites are the birds and he feels sad we don't have water reserves for birds to drink water . No points for guessing where my mugs n buckets disappear , they are in the backyard with some lentils n rice grains inside the water so birds can come n have a healthy meal and quench their thirst . 

Recently I noticed some fruits from his plate being put outside when questioned he goes " that's for the worms " birds might get bored drinking water n grains ,they might want to eat some worms as well .. So far I ve noticed no worms but yes lot of ants so I had to throw it all away . 

 Growing up , I used to play in my backyards , but don't think I was this creative or asked so many questions or rather did anything . I remember me planting rose plants . Planting seeds and waiting for them to grow . I do remember my obsession with nature was interms of what I get when I do something . But looking at my son not expecting something back from nature but doing something to keep nature happy makes me glad that there must be something I am doing right as a parent !!

We pretend leaves in the backyard to be animals and play pretend games when ever we are bored

Our journey will continue and We will try newer things to attract more birds every day !! 

Whats in a name ??

Well shakespear said that and little did he know that everything is in a name .
Its always attractive to have a sexy sounding name with tons of people would atleast be keen to talk to you before going for looks. A guy with a name Raj can woo women even before meeting her as she might think he is her Shah rukh khan from DDLJ and a 2 liner name would be least appealing amonst the women . The same holds good for girls as well.

Well i am one of those with a first name -which is 17 letters followed by a middle name which is 10 letters  and a surname to top it !!
Yes i do belong to the two liner names which is not very appealing but then i have humour and looks to back it ;) hahaha

I found it so tough for people to pronounce my name especially non Indians , Some address me with just half of my first name ..some with my surname and some with my husband's surname . I am not a fussy person i respond to anything even a oie , or a hey i dont care much .

I love my name it means a soft and sensitive one , which i am definetly not !! But i like the thought behind naming me by my parents . There was a story behind my name : My dad had thought of a 6 letter name and went to register me then realised there was one more person there who was registering the same name for his daughter so my da thought he cant give me a common name and it had to be unique so he 5 more letters to my name and made it sound unique . I am so thankful to god that my dad dnt meet someone with the same 11 letter name else i would have had 18 letter first name !!!
 

Our dear Granny !!

Me and all my cousins call my grandma "thotha" donno who came up with it first ..Since i was the eldest i believe the name was coined by me. Being the eldest i have always been the most pampered in my large family .Summer holidays used to be fun when our grandma would tell us stories abt my mom and my aunts and uncles it used to be fun listening to what a close knit family we are and it influenced the closeness amongst the cousins.

There were tons of stories shared , I love the part when i was decieding my career path , my granny said she was only 4th Pass ,but knows a lot about life .she told me "No matter how successful you are in terms of your career , fame and money if you fail to maintain balance in personal life its all not worth at all".
Every thing she knows , Food receipes, home made medicines are learnt by sharing with friends and family . Loving family no matter how odd they are matters in the long run , all five fingers are never the same we need to understand each one has its own use and we need every finger to help us move anything .
She said having worldly knowledge is more important than bookish
I did not give it a thought back then as i was young and more influenced by friends than family.
Today my first priority is family as i have realised if i ignore my personal life or my health , my company doesnt look after me its my family and in every difficult situation ,my colleagues can empathise but wont wipe away my tears. One of my colleagues' death had a very strong influence for this reality to sink in .

When i met you ...

There was no expectation from my side ..I didnt think it would work ,I didnt think ..I just met you ..Our first chat over a cuppa coffee was alrite ..there were no Sparks ..It was a blind date sorta thing

where i didnt have a clue about how you looked ..The only things i gathered from the first meet was you had a big gang of friends and you worked at the same place i did and you have spotted me acting crazy in the company provided transport ..the only thing common was passion for good food

 

I didnt think i would meet you again but we did not coz you contacted me coz i emailed

you and asked you for your number ..i thought you had attitude issue and dnt bother to call

back . I wasnt sure if you wanted to meet me until i got to know you wanted to marry me

really ?? on what basis did u deceide to marry me ?? on common taste for food ??

I asked you to meet me again and we did meet , you were late by 5 min but i dnt whinge

we met and we spoke this time not about food but about traffic Jams ..duh !!

 

We finally did exchange numbers yay !! and i waited for 2 days with no bloody calls or messages

and this made me wonder seriously this guy wants to marry me and doesnt wanna call

and i sent this message asking how you were and then i get a call back with " i am going out with my colleagues " will be out for the weekend and see you on Monday .

 

Honest to god i have been terrible at understanding Men ..I dont get direct hints , subtle hints also dont work I did not know if i wanted to be with you . Weekend wasnt easy i did a lotta research on how to understand men,I prayed god to show me a way out . I told myself if i have to give this guy a chance i should do it with an open mind,I should cut myself off from every other distraction , not compare with anyone i ever knew .You seemed nice , you were very polite , bit leaning on the shy side . I did not find a reason to say NO to him ..thats what i thought i should

hang in there until i fnd a reson to say " Sorry we arent compatible "

 

Then it was monday and i was busy and i get a call from you ..You ask me if i was free and you wanted to meet methe voices in my head were going "Its a monday " how can you get away from work ..what are you gonna tell your managers ??

you were in my office and said " lets go for a movie " I was thrilled and said alrite ..Dnt care about anything .It was just beautiful when you held my hand ( i dnt think what made you think you could do that i wouldnt slap you back ) and then you tell me that you have fallen in love with me ..I couldnt stop blushing in the dark movie hall .

 

We spoke a bit , It was nice , made me feel good and then i noticed how attractive you were ...and we met again and again almost every day after work . We spoke about dreams .We spoke about how you didnt have any money but were sure to make it big ( today i am so proud thinking of that as you have achieved a whole lot on your own Ability ).It was at this moment i felt i had to marry you , you were so genuine . You were so honest , you just seemed so right .

 

We have had many disagreements over the years but at times when i am very upset and think why did i ever marry you.. i think of those beautiful courtship days and smile !!

Just STOP !!

There are times people share jokes, outright ridiculous stuffs , some that makes you sit back and wonder . I got this beautiful forward by a friend , which made so much sense .In short it said keep the positivity , get rid of the negatives vibes , enjoy every moment and be grateful for what you have and don't bloody compare your life with anyone else's . I strongly believe in this I really think life has taught me to be happy no matter what as we are the fortunate ones , our worries are the least compared to a whole lot who worry if they will go back home alive , if their kids have enought food to eat , if they will go to bed with their husband or will be forced to spend the night with strangers , really we have a lot to be thankful !!

Here's the link that I have been raving about http://www.lifebuzz.com/just-stop/

MH370

So I haven't been so active on my blog coz I've been busy following the Malaysian airlines flight MH370 .. Its just so bizarre , very wierd that in today's world when I can track my lost phone or iPad by sending signals remotely to it, the world leaders fail to locate a huge Boeing !!

I sense a foul play , I did from the start when US and China together could not find the flight , they are the super powers , so this means tomr anybody can travel anywhere and seek asylum without being detected . 

It's such a unsafe world , we can't do anything , nor go anywhere safe if a flight at altitude of 35000 can be hijacked and disappear without being traced , imagine what would happen to everybody on earth !! 

Waiting to hear some news abt the airlines 

International woman's day !!

Happy woman's day to all the woman who think they need a day to celebrate who they are !! I do have questions why there is no men's day ? Is it coz 364 days are dedicated to men and just one day to women ? I donno the answer , but it's funny we ask for equality , we demand respect but why should we ask or demand ? Shouldn't it be natural . Women today are not equal to men , women cannot do a whole lotta stuff like men do , are you wondering what they are here are couple of them : 

1) women cannot get out of the house and not worry abt anything else , our mind wander if something's on the gas ? Did I switch  off the iron box ? Did I feed the child/ pets ? Did I send the email to the right person ? Did I water the plants ? Did I turn off the tap etc etc where as a man can get dressed take his keys and not bother abt anything . 

2) A woman cannot drive without being judged by her copassengers or people driving on the road .

What equality are we talking about ? Can a man give birth to a child ? Can he have stretch marks and worry abt it ? 

We are different and cannot be same or be treated equal .. What we can do is show love and respect towards each other everyday and not just one day in a year !! 

All those fwds abt woman being wonderful mum, daughter, wife,sister, girlfriend and friend is quiet suffocating and absolutely unnecessary .

Baby or puppy?

If you are single and have no one in particular to mingle but feel something is missing in your life , some love , some comfort , somebody to go back home to what would you do ? 

 Today at the lunch table a colleague was asking . She couldn't make up her mind , she dnt know if she wanted to adopt a child or a pup . I found the comparison funny .

 I wud say pup coz if you are single , you defn have a life, parties, dates, shopping to go to  , you want to be responsible towards someone not and not be tied down.Its easier with a pet : you don't need to be there 24/7 , it's legal to leave them alone at home , you don't have to take them with you where ever you go where as kids need your time , patience , love , affection all at the same time , every time,everyday . 

Personally I do not regret having a child , he's the most beautiful thing that happened to me and no I wouldn't trade him for a pup !!!

Whom do you want to share your seat with ?

When you enter a room full of strangers and you don't have any particular seating arrangement and asked to share a seat with , who would you like to sit next to ? Or if you have a seat who would you want to occupy that seat ? 

I enter the train and look around for empty seats , if there are many I start to choose the one where a fat person is sitting would be my ideal choice , we can both stretch ourselves and no one else would wanna sit in between ( very ideal must say ) 

If there is a anyone with a packet of chips , I very much avoid that person , coz they make me hungry and crave junk food .

Sometimes I avoid a punk with tattooed arms and pink streaks coz they are just wierd . I avoid drunks or couples who have horny harmones wanting to feel up each other . If a person is too loud on the phone I do not want to be mistaken as his/her friend so I avoid them 

If a person has a smiley face , I my happy to sit next to them . 

With my list of preferences I m surprised I don't go standing all the time and I get a seat to sit . Maybe weirdos don't travel too often . I'm sure 1000 s of other people think I'm wierd and avoid sitting next to me .

This is for people who think I'm wierd : Gosh I'm so lovable people you must really try sitting next to me and striking a conversation which will keep you entertained throughout your journey. !!

Being a Superpower

Every developed country wants to claim this title as being the only supreme power and do watever they wish and terrorise the rest . 

This is exactly what America has been doing and Russia is planning to do with Ukraine . 

Chinese troops have been invading India for a long time now , just our leaders are so incompetent they let them get away with it . 

The outbreak of a regional war and repercussions it has on the rest of the world is insane .it's a shame , feeling helpless , hope it's just some crazy aggression by Putin and he cools down soon ( pls somebody get him a glass of ice old water to cool off !!)

I was really disappointed today on reading news , hope Ukraine finds a permanent solution. I do not want any war please !! 

How Indian are you ?

I am an Indian by birth and no I don't speak Hindu or Indian ( in fact there is no language called so , I pity the general knowledge of such ppl who ask such questions ) . 

Who are Indians ? You may ask ,

Indians are from India which is in ASIA ( for most of the ppl in Australia who call Chinese origins as Asians and Indians as Indians : I thought I was an Asian until I got outta India and was shocked with my knowledge on geography , either wat I read in textbooks and the location on the World map was right or the education department in Australia has some serious updates to be done to their textbooks )

Indians are predominantly brown ,no you  people from up north , you do not fall under white , no matter how much fair and lovely you smear and sorry to break this people from south are not black (you could get sued if you used this word in US to refer to an individual's skin tone ) yes we are a bunch of racists , we are proud of our colour and loudness , but if any other national says anything to us we make a huge cry and ban them as racists .

We have many states , many languages and many religions (castes and sub castes within them ) we are like many countries within one as the diversity varies from one state to other . 

India is developing nation ( I read that when I was in school , hopefully will live to read India's name listed amongst the developed countries.

I have learned a lot about India ever since I moved outta the country . 

> We can be treated like shit in our country , our politicians can screw around but if any outsider says anything or points us out , we can be united and brand them racists .

> I did not know Varanasi was a famous tourist spot and every international tourist has it in his bucket list to click pics at Ganges.

> Holi was a national festival ( I have never played Holi in my lifetime , the idea of colours all over me did not thrill me , maybe a lil bit of colour on my cheek that's it ) 

> Mehendi ( called as henna tattoos ) was very well known and people were fascinated by the designs .

> people thought Buddha was from China (thanks to my history books , I could fight abt Buddhism originating from India )

> usage of turmeric and other spices in our food was so beneficial , it is an art combining aroma, taste and medicinal properties to lead healthy life which is a part of our diet.

> using hands to eat ensures all 6 senses  to work together , which culminates into better taste.

> yoga is one of the well known exercise and most of the westerners swear by yoga and meditation .I noticed crossfit gaining more popular in India.

> we are leading the world in our population ( nothing to be proud of ) , but if anyone messes or ridicules an Indian no better way to answer " I come from a land where we have mastered the art of kamasutra and we can really screw you with more  number of ways than you can ever imagine (read it somewhere ) ". 

We must be proud of our advances in science and technology , empower our villages and educate people to love one another .

Yell n tell ?

I've read reports of 7 identical people co-existing on earth at the same time. I've never met anyone who looks like me , hopefully will meet at least one in my lifetime (Would be wierd tho) If you want to go do something wild just go ahead and do it , you could always claim it to be one of the 7 identical person !!

There are these unique bunch who do not look alike / speak the same lingo , but share same habit - yelling . No it's not a virtue to possess .

I do belong to that category .. Dnt see myself falling into that bucket 10 years ago , now I can yell at family members and not feel guilty , terrible to possess this unique trait ,Working very hard to get this outta my system !!

When I was single and had no clue abt parenting. I would look at yelling kids and wonder why can't the parent just smack the kid and stop it or tell the kid they will be returned back to the baby shop from where they had been bought .

Today , being a mom myself , I can only empathise with those moms who have to deal with a yeller ,You can easily see tell from their eyes the helplessness .. Wanting to just bury their faces .

Better not to judge anyone on their behaviour , no one other than the person himself knows what they are going through.

Diet is a four letter word !!

If only it was harder to gain weight and easier to loose ,half of the problems in this world would be lost . Coming to think of it half of the food industry would be on profit ,maccas and KFC would be minting more than they currently are. The medical  industry wud be on loss !!

I have learnt the hard way , I cannot diet my simple mantra is "eat healthy" and walk as much as possible ( doesn't seem to reduce my tummy fat , but what the hell sounds cool and feels good to know I have my very own mantra ).

I am a foodie by birth , blame my culture and parents for introducing yummy food.

I cannot resist food and if something has chocolate / ice cream I cannot resist .

I cannot resist pastas, sea food, meat - basically I cannot resist food . So I have decided to go my way - portion control !!

I try to restrict and limit how much I eat the entire day , eat every 2 hrs but the culprit is dinner time I overindulge in high carb diet and to top it my husband says "ice cream " at 11 pm in the night and I try to say "no thanks " but then I can't go to bed with my mind and tummy craving for ice cream and  then the inevitable happens , I fall off the entire diet cycle . 

Marriage ?

Coming together of a man and woman with lotsa blessings from god, family and friends is marriage ( which ideally u can do if you are in a serious relationship and are really committed and give a damn to what society thinks ).

During the wedding ceremonies both partners swear to be faithful, trustworthy and share abundance of love , it's a different question as to how long they will remember these , No really , if you are married for more than say 2 years try remembering the promises you made to each other . 

Marriage is very fragile it's build on promises n trust and can be broken very easily .Its like any relationship if u break it , you can fix it but cracks will surely show .You need love but more than that you need to maintain respect towards each other .

At times I wonder if two individuals can be together , have kids , buy houses and not be married ? Wonder how many such  people exist . God bless them !!

 Life becomes easier if we do not have much expectations ( I wouldn't say any , coz we are humans ) .

It's okay to fight with ur partner , don't expect a guy to come with a sorry coz he can't or doesn't know .you might have noticed him making up or saying sorry before marriage ..( Yeah he did coz he wanted you and the fear of loosing you made him say sorry ). Now things are different , you are married and he doesn't really have to say anything .You want to lead a peaceful life ..Ditch the ego and go make up !!

The first year of wedding is so full of adjustments , no fun without silly tiffs . You could have a fight , not speak with each other and not remember the reason behind the fight.

Most importantly quitting isn't the solution to anything . Staying in a relation and fighting is !!

Tomr will be a better day and you will not remember bitter things of the past.

Everytime you get low think of the happier times, think of all the excitement of the young bride .Remember the dreams of the young hearts !! Think of all the sweet things you shared and smile ..Give urself a pat and move along !! 

Today being  Maha shivaratri festival- Celebrating the union of Shiv and shakthi ..what better example can we get from the storybooks , they have been the most adored couple .Shiva has forever been known for loosing his cool and their fights are so famous it even resulted in the birth of the famous most adored god -Lord Ganesha !! 

Marriage has highs and lows and sometimes goes at a median pace . Enjoy the highs , brace yourself for the lows and cruise through the median !!

Have you been kind today ?

Kindness is defn a virtue , doesn't come easy ..it has to be a part of your lifestyle . You have to grow up seeing your parents be kind and compassionate .

I have been fortunate of such good upbringing ( I realise it only now , better late than never )

We do not have to do big things , just few kind words appreciating someone or the least we can do is share a smile . 

Usually I'm smiling at some random person while crossing roads / changing trains and my husband goes " do you know that person " and my simple answer is " Absolutely not " .

He still hasn't figured out why he married an absolute mental person !!

I believe it releases feel good harmones ,which is good for ones well being ( I like to believe so ).

I can be very kind and sweet with everyone ,but when it comes to family , I love them to bits and have to be very critical to every act of theirs. I find my family to be my punching bag . I have to be mean n yell ( By the time I reach home I guess the good harmones get exhausted ) 

My aim is to be nice and kind to every family member (not all of them at once , at least one a day ) 

Why do we write ?

When I started sharing my blog amongst friends , I was asked constantly why am I writing ? What drove me ? 

Honestly , I am no writer . I am very amateur . I don't edit many a times I just write whatever crosses my mind . 

I write to clear my mind . I also write to kill   Time . We live in a busy world where nobody has time for anyone and trying to call friends and talk to them just never happens as each of us live in a different time zone and each of us have our own struggle and issues to deal with . 

Best option was to pen down watever crossed my mind . None of this is for attention or money . 

This is just a medium to share my thoughts !!

Suicide

No human being on this earth can be happy all the time ..there is a downtime and there are highs in life .

This mornings paper reported some 4 incidents of suicide ( inspite of me telling myself I sudnt read those depressing news , I end up reading them and feel sad ) Each case had different issues to deal with 

One was in debt and dnt know how to deal with life . Second one was a high profile TV personality who committed suicide due to depression .Third and fourth were due to failures in love .

I do not know what could be so strong that could drive a person to end their own lives . If things don't turn out Wudnt you want to fight everyone and show u can emerge even if ur pushed deep into pits ?Society has so much pressure on individuals , we are expected to live according to somebody else's whims and fancies. sometimes it's ok to fail , it's ok to do nothing , it's ok to cry out loud . It is just okay . Is a love worth suffering for ? 

Sometimes I guess heart overtakes the mind and makes an individual very vulnerable , very confused and very helpless . 

Declutter !!

Today I decided to Declutter the mess at home throw away everything that I haven't been using past 3 years .My funda was simple , if I did not use something past 3 years the chances of me using them or missing them or needing them for the next 3 or 30 years will be next to zero .

Just then it did strike me ,do we ever Declutter people from my mind or thought ? 

I have over 100 friends on my Facebook . Yes I do !! Not sure how or when that happened .No I do not talk to all of them everyday , some I haven't met since a decade some are aquiantance , some colleagues,school and college mates, a few good friends , a whole lotta relatives .

Phew !!! Would I like to unfriend a whole lot of them ? Yes !! But will I ?? Never know , one fine day I might wake up n say to myself I don't wanna keep in touch with a whole lotta people . That day my friend I'm gonna unfriend all those people who have been spamming my news feed !!

News !!

When you open your news paper every morn what does any one want to read ??  Some interesting news ?? Some fun gossips ?? News about scientific advances ?

I am so put off with the news we have to read  today , it's about shitty politics , gang rapes, molestation , suicides , bomb attacks, fights , gun shots etc

The headlines puts you off , makes me ask if we are progressing or are we stepping back ? 

As a kid ,I was so fearless , I used to travel alone by flight to meet my cousins . I used to take my bike and cycle around the streets without anyone watching over me . I used to go out late evenings for movies with friends , travel in lonely roads in two wheelers alone . My mom would freak out if I was late by 5 min , I never understood what was the big deal . I lived in a safe world ( I did think ) .

It was easier to trust people , not sure what kind of a world are we leaving behind for our kids ? They will have to watch their back every day ?? Less of love , more of fear and untrustworthy people around . 

It's a shame !! Hope this changes and we have happy and exciting news to read and share in the coming years !!

Ambition !!

In this journey called life , we have been through many cross roads. Some has been to make big life changing decisions , be it choosing a partner, friend or career path . Nothing has been easy each of us have fought our very own battles.

I have been really confused when it came to choosing a career path , I have had no clue what I wanted to do as mostly I wanted to do everything . I have managed to live it up and try my hand in a variety of fields that interested me like sales and marketing , event coordinator , call center-customer support, Recruitment, technical writing , resource management , project management office and testing in the exact same order after completing my engineering in electronics . 

I have been fascinated by acting n dancing, military ,medical(psychology or elder care ) and child care as well . Haven't yet tried my luck in those fields yet . God willing , some day I might .

Signing off on that note 

Cheers 

Simple English please !!

Being in Australia or straya (like the Aussies call it ) , there have been couple of times when people say a word I don't quiet get it . English isn't my first language but I've learnt the language over the years and can converse decent enf . 

I have noticed few phrases the Aussies use very often "g'day mate " - greeting to fnd , mate is a friendly word used to address anybody . 

 "How's it goin ? " - how are you .

"No worries " - that's alrite

Aussies are very casual and enjoy sarcasm .. I dnt hve issues , I just join them and laugh aloud 

Funny thing , yest a manager asked me "how you travelling ? Hope you're not covered by snow " I was zapped , was wondering wat does he mean ? Was that for me ? Has he gotten mixed up with identities ? Well apparently not .. What he really meant to ask was " how are you doing ? Are you stressed ? " hahaha 

I'm so glad I dnt quickly revert to him with a " there's no snow , I'm taking train back home " 

Working mum n stay at home mum !!

I read this article where a working mum empathises with a stay at home mum and describes all the difficulties faced and the stay at home mum thanks and completely understands the dilemma of a working mum 

This time when I was on holidays and visiting friends and families there was constant nagging on how thin I looked or my kid , My culinary skills were challenged and I was questioned over wat I cook and eat or if we eat out daily or survive on maggi . It was annoying , it was frustrating to have to answer to such stupidity when I do not judge you or interfere about how you raise your child please do not interfere 

I was asked why my son doesn't speak his mother tongue and what I should be doing to teach him ..i was like seriously ??? Do u think I wish he dnt speak or know his origin ?? He spends 10 hours of his day time with English speaking teachers n peers ..just take a hike and don't bother me morons !!!

Ps: here's the link to the article I read very well written .

http://carolynee.net/a-letter-from-a-working-mother-to-a-stay-at-home-mother-and-vice-versa/

Autocorrect ???

Is it just me who is technologically challenged or anybody else who has issues with autocorrect ..no seriously why can't I just say what I want to ???

I hve had so many instances where I was put off by the autocorrect tht I don't even wanna try voice recognition where we talk and the phone tries to understand wat we mean to say isn't it simple just to type the damn thing 

I'm just venting coz I meant to say "wow we are so proactive "instead ended up with "wow we are so provocative " to a colleague ...haven't spoken to tht one for a while now 

My secret life !!

To whosoever it may concern ..all characters are fictitious and  are made up when ever the author was bored in life .

I was watching Robin sharmas inspirational video ..which said consider this as your last year and do what you have always wanted to do ...I  have always wanted to write a movie script .

Here goes the story : This story is abt saaya ,a fun loving girl ,who was  shy around everybody only her friends knew she was completely crazy !!

Saaya lived in this loving family ,with mum(she argues with ),dad(she loves,respects and is scared of ) bro ( she yells at),granny(her secrets are safe with her) and a maid (whom she shocks with her stories).

She leads a protective childhood with dad dropping her to school and picking her back ..she hardly interacts with gals and thinks she is one of the guys mabbe coz of her short boy cut hairstyle...she was once pushed by a woman for entering the Bus where ladies were supposed to enter ,mistaking her for a young boy .once a  girl tried to pair her up with a boy and saaya walks up to the class teacher and cries ..the teacher dnt know if she had to laugh or comfort saaya (she must have thought this kid is wierd )

Saaya was academically good and made her parents proud  ,her cousins hated her as they were all compared and were asked to live up to those marks .

She passed with flying colours in her 10th and got admitted to a college for 11th ,this was going to be her first interaction with the big bad world .The night before the first day of college she was restless and she dreamt of  boys teasing her and whistling at her or throwing rockets at her .The next day she was disappointed to know nothing happened and all those waste guys from her school were in this college and they wouldn't tease as they were such good boys and also because she wore loose baggy tops and wore a big black spectacles .she dnt let this disappoint her she went home to tell her maid how a guy winked at her and she threw flying kisses at him .she told her granny she was ready to have a boy friend .

Two years of college passed with just studies and more studies but a secret crush on a guy at tuitions kept the interests on ,he sat behind her and she was too shy to turn back n look at him ,maybe it was his husky voice ..she had this Hindi song play in her mind "kaun ho tum Jo dil mein basaye jaathe ho ..pehli nazar mein apna banaye jaathe ho "never under estimate a woman's instinct she knew he too had some feelings for her but it was hard to say anything coz she hadn't yet turned and looked at his face .

It was the last week of tuitions and she was followed home by tht guy she knew it coz she could sense it she turned back and he smiled he walked closer and said "hi "and she said " hi "with a blush and then he said "I have a math doubt how do we solve this problem " ,she literally froze she was hoping for a "I love you ..will you be my gf ??"...she was disappointed and felt he wasn't worth her time .

she got busy preparing for engineering exams,of course she had to get into a good engineering college filled with loadsa hunks on bikes ..wow couldn't wait for the day she was ready to take on the world .

she dreamt the night before her first day of engineering that the boys would run behind her beg her to be their girl friend .she would be dressed in red and wear a sexy lipstick and enter her college and all the senior boys would be waiting to rag her .

She woke up that morning excited to the core ..spent 1 hr in the shower much to her brothers disgust and wore her red top and entered the living area and faced her annoyed mum who told her to go change and wear something loose else her dad would be upset with her (her mum was good at sending her on guilt trips)...annoyed saaya goes to her room and changes and wears some horrible salwar looking like a behenji with dupatta and goes to college in the bus

No one ragged ...all the girls looked like nerds and all the guys looked shorter and younger than her ..she was taller than the rest of the class ...her eyes were moist wondering what the hell will she do here for the next 4 years ...she was sure it was gonna be boring and she overheard some of the conversations in her class she felt like she was in a nerd heaven

But life had other plans she spoke to a girl who asked her sun sign n was excited as they both shared the same sign and the gal tells her they cud be best friends..this was exciting she made a best friend on second day of college which wasn't a bad deal .

Saaya was standing in the corridor of her class where she overhears a bunch of her classmates asking people "who is the most sexiest in the college ?" Apparently they were taking a poll she was shocked n promised herself tht she Wud stay away from that lot but you know how life always has other plans she ended up being best friends with that bunch .. They stuck by each other through every class tests n exams ,if one flunked the others wud   support them by cracking jokes .life was good .life was fun n exciting only missing stuff was love life but Saaya kinda reminded her she has to be married to some guy her parents select anyways why bother falling in love ,why go through the heart breaks better to be free have a crush on everyone love all commit to none seemed to be wisest choice 

Talking about crushes well there was one cute,chubby guy who was handsome n charming and had half of the college gals drool over him ..Saaya was one amongst the many ..she was almost esthetic when a friend said we must play a prank on him someone volunteer to write a love letter...so it was her first love letter which she was writing and somehow managed to sneak into the guys books and then the worst happened the guy read out the letter aloud and said "This is the worst letter ever ..my grandmother wud have written a better one " damn she hated him but consoled herself with "at least he read it " 

There was a hope that he wud someday realise she was the one who wrote it n fall for her ..she got hold of his number and wanted to wish "happy friendship day" then thought damn my fnds have a crush on this guy too or maybe in love with him so she got hold of all his fnd's number and rang everyone and wished them just so that no one suspects her intentions 

Then there were these college fests where you meet cute guys just flirt around ,giggle and never see them again .. If you like any guy the idea was to cheer for his team n get noticed 

There were also these late evng outings with friends but fear of getting permissions at home would make her throw a bucket of water at her bike and pretend it rained at the other end of the city or say project work and stay up late night watching movie at friends place

Then started the trend of internet chatting where everyone Wud discuss how to find love online ...so Saaya thought this is it ...I don't hve to get outta the house stay at home inside my room n make friends 

So an online account was opened and it was exciting to enter the internet world where you can hide your identity chat with anybody and not get caught this was going to be fun she thought .as soon as she logged into a chat site there were people messaging her "ASL " she was like "WTF" then after discussion with other friends heard it meant Age, Sex ,location and the whole chat room was filled with desperate weirdos ..ewe this wasn't what she was signing up for .

Saaya had crazy set of friends too who dnt like the idea of ASL or adult chatting and thought they should gang up against those weirdos  so Saaya n her fnd moksh   Login as two lovers and chat with each other n let the rest of the weirdos get annoyed with them most of them thought  they were two males haha the chats Wud be so hilarious that everyone in that chat room Wud exit ..Saaya Wud pretend to be mumtaaz and moksh shahjahan (that Wud be their chat names )..life was fun until Saaya met neel ,who was in one such chat room .he was someone who blew her away .no pics were ever exchanged ,there was no exchange of any personal ids it was only the chat room meeting and general chats .. Saaya had a feeling she was falling deeply for this guy ,there was never a instance of flirting or dirty talks it was talking about day to day activities and cracking jokes and having a laugh and that was it ..this internet stuff went on for a while almost a year , Saaya was in love with an unknown person .Her friends mocked it could be anyone a stalker, a rapist,a lesbian , an old man anybody but she dnt care she loved being in love and this felt more real than the real world ,but then one fateful day Saaya had a chat to neel and confessed how she was feeling hopeless as she can't get out of the virtual world she's been in love the whole time and knew he dnt want anything to do with it as he had found a gf (who has moved in with him ) and this chatting crap had to stop.she was heartbroken but got over maybe it's easier when a relation exists in a hypothetical world.

They all graduated and each chose a different path , many left to the US for higher education ..Saaya wasn't sure wat to do so she started to look out for jobs 

Job was hectic but fun she was supposed to work with people and interact with them on a daily basis ..Saaya met amazing ppl who she knew Wud remain friends for life ... Life was like a sine wave ..going back up again .. It was filled with giggles ,checking out guys 

,checking their butts, checking their gfs .. It was absolute madness 

Her friends moksh and sakshi would visit her whenever they returned from the states and they Wud go partying it was madness just drink and dance like no ones watching.

Sakshi was going to hang out with some friends and she invited Saaya to join and did mention to her that they were going to party real hard as the guys she's meeting are good looking and fun .Saaya was excited and wore her red top n sneaked outta the house .

It was a dry day ..no bars ..no alcohol it was total ban day as it was Gandhi jayanthi ...the gals were disappointed but not until they met the guys ...omg saaya's shy side woke up she fell really shy and couldn't stop blushing there he was the perfect guy right in front eating his chicken ..men and food was sucha turn on ..it wasn't just that he had the most sexist butt she had ever laid her eyes on ..hahaha...she was like this is it ..I love his voice ..love the way he talks ..so totally can make love anytime and she whispers this to her friend and they both burst out laughing ... Raj was his name ..he was just the tall dark handsome man she wanted to walk into her life but he hadn't even noticed her which was disappointing.

Saakshi talks about raj's other friend Rahul who was fair n had brown eyes and was shy and very sweet but Saaya was blind in love with raj and so badly wanted to be in touch with him

It was the time when ORKUT was catching up and all young ppl were on this social site so she went online and searched for raj and yes he was on ORKUT she sent him and his fnd a friend request .They both instantly accepted it ..this was the moment to yell and give a hifi but Saaya was at work and had to behave .there were days of chatting on ORKUT and making friends ,time passed and numbers were exchanged very soon Saaya was getting invites to join the boys  for drinks or to go clubbing ..this is it ..this was what Saaya has been waiting for This is life she used to convince herself "fun and good company" and this is what she deserved !!

But you all know life is so unfair you cannot get everything ..saaya's  parents were under constant pressure to marry her off .. Her parents had started looking out for boys and Saaya hated them all as a particular man had stolen her heart and it wasn't fun ..she was serious abt it 

Saaya thought she should tell raj and see what he says the worse cud be he would laugh at her and say "get a life " she was thinking she should by then she saw message from raj asking Saaya to introduce him to a hot looking bitchy female .. Ohh how she hated tht gal .. She just wished she left the city n moved away. Being an ass that she was she dnt do that she instead befriended tht idiotic gal and introduced her to raj  .. Saaya was heartbroken .he had no feelings for her he dnt like her , maybe there was no attraction ..she wasn't even sure if he knew she existed .. This was sad this was terrible ..raj's friend Rahul asked Saaya what was she doing there with the rest of the crowd and she dnt really fit there  .. She agreed thought that was so right instead of staying there and getting her heart smashed into pieces it was better to go ahead and look for some guys for marriage.

It wasn't easy finding a guy for marriage most of them looked like they gave a damn , some spoke abt their salaries ,some looked like uncles and some about their hobbies these chats only made Saaya depressed after meeting the guys Saaya would close her bedroom door and cry ..every morn she woke up to wet pillow she thought she would succumb to pressure and just say yes to some guy and get married but then she couldn't do that , if she ever did that it would mean end of everything she did not want to marry for any other reason but love .

Just then phone rang and raj and Rahul invited her to join them she just looked at her hopeless self in the mirror but was helpless she wanted to live her life , even if it's farce she wanted to live it up meet them laugh be rejuvenated mentally and come home to face new challenges .

She prayed , was a good kid then why weren't things falling into places how hard was it for god to smile upon her and make sure she was making out with raj and not sit and witness him all over one idiotic woman who was just using him but dnt look like he was complaining as he was having fun .

Saaya's fnds told her to move on she sat and thought move on to what or whom there dnt seem like there was anyone but hold on a sec there was Rahul , he was good looking and nice but then there were 100's of girls behind him , over the months Saaya had become good friends with the guys she adored them , liked them , it was impossible not to fall in love with these amazing guys but what next ? Sit n collect pieces of broken hearts ? 

Saaya started to look at pics of guys her parents had proposed for marriage none of them caught her eyes .The hot chick whom raj was crazy abt had broken up or donno what happened she was outta the picture there was a silver lining for Saaya .. She beamed with joy ,even tried to console raj saying she was sorry to introduce him to sucha crazy woman .. He smiled must've thought in his head  "silly gal ..I've had my share of fun "

Rahul left without a goodbye ,apparently he found a job and had to leave ..so Saaya and raj got back to hanging together ..it hurt Saaya to hang out be with a person she was madly in love with and not confess it coz she knew he was hanging there coz he probably thought she was a good fnd and not someone who wanted to be friends with benefits . They started visiting each other , the more Saaya hung out she felt alive she knew she was gonna get nothing outta this but loved being in love .Just hearing him say anything would bring a smile to her face ,watching same movie over and over just to sit next to him made her happy ...it dnt matter , nothing did she felt she was living it all up with him .

Then it happened one evng raj asked her if he could kiss her ..she froze she couldn't breathe ,in her head she went " don't ask just do it ... Coz I've never kissed and don't wanna make a fool of myself" , on the outside she just smiled dnt know what to do ...how could she ?? Her parents were busy finding a good match for her and here she was gonna be kissing a guy .. What if this kiss was the best thing and she can never get over it ? It was everything she had ever wished for but dnt do it coz she dnt think it was right .. It wasn't right to lead him on ... It wasn't right to kiss and never be able to fall in love again ( that's what she thought) .. She walked away and patted him ..she knew she Wud regret it , this was gonna be the best thing happening to her ..but she dnt think it was ok to kiss  one and marry another .

Days later she met a guy who was keen to marry her ,sameer ,apparently they had common friends and her cousins knew each other ..Saaya wasn't sure what to do she cut herself off from raj ..she thought she should give a fair chance , she even told him they should meet up n see how they go ... She realised he was nice , witty , good looking and very charming .she acted like she dnt notice it all ...her parents wanted to know what she thought as sameer had said "yes" to her .. Saaya dnt want to     Get married unless she was convinced it was love  .. They hung out ..sameer took her by surprise ..he revealed his past , he shared his dreams and ambitions , he literally swept her off her feet .. They started dating , making out  it was more than what Saaya had always wanted ..she went home and said "yes" to her parents ..it was all formalised and she couldn't wait to be mrs sameer .

In the end it always turns out to be right , if it doesn't remember it's not the end !! so folks keep dreaming , keep praying for love you never know when the almighty lord will smile upon you !!